How many times have you wondered if your partner’s relationship is normal or is it madly possessive? Sometimes it all seems so innocent that you really can’t tell? How can you tell apart what’s healthy and what’s not? When can you finally pull the plug and say enough is enough?
The main problem with possessive partners and relationships is that it all starts so innocent and you may even think it’s cute and adorable, but as your partner becomes more comfortable with you he will start pushing your boundaries. One thing will lead to another and after a while his “cute” possessiveness will inevitably grow into anxiety, anger and even emotional or physical abuse. Unless you snap out of it soon, you risk locking yourself in an endless cycle of abuse with no chance of escaping.
10 Major signs you’re in a possessive relationship
Are you in a healthy relationship, full of support and respect that makes you feel happy and complete, or are you in a destructive relationship that makes you depressed and anxious and disrupts your health and well-being? You may find it hard to admit that your relationship isn’t quite what you imagined it to be but you need to get realistic and realize that it’s not taking you anywhere. You have to make a decision, do you want to continue destroying your life or do you think you deserve something much better?
Here’s what you need to look out for and if you notice it, run as far as your legs take you:
- You feel like you need to do as your partner says all the time because if you don’t you will have to face his/her constant nagging, demanding, threatening and emotional blackmailing.
- They’re in complete control of everything you do. They need to allow if you want to go out with friends, meet a family member, go shopping or take a break from work. Your partner is the one who makes the decisions about everything and you don’t even have a say in it. If you start spending more time outside the house, they will start nagging you and listing all kinds of reasons why you need to spend more time home and eventually you get tired and obey by his/her wishes. They need to approve every person you see or every place you visit, otherwise you’re in for a hell-ride.
- They act like stalkers, keeping an eye on everything you do, so much so, that you feel like they’re stalking you. This includes your social media presence, your phone, your emails, your browsing history, and even your mail. They may even show up out of the blue when you’re out with friends to check who are you really out with.
- They’re clingy and obsessively needy and they want to remind you all the time that you’re the center of their world. They want to show you that you’re the only thing they need and because they’re with you they have no need for other social relationships.
- They do everything they can to pull you away from your friends and family. They would be happiest if you only have them in your life and don’t spend time with anyone else. They will talk bad about your friends, family and coworkers, criticize them or even make up stuff to distance you from them.
- They don’t respect your personal space and time. There’s no such thing as personal space in a possessive relationship, they impose themselves so much that everything you own, even your time, becomes theirs.
- They’re extremely paranoid and jealous when you spend time with other men/women. Even when you talk with someone, or receive a phone call or a message they need to know who it was from and what they wanted with you. They need to know about every friend you’ve accepted on Facebook and every person you’ve followed on Instagram. And if you’re in contact with someone they find suspicious you need to break all ties with them or else….
- They get to choose what you wear, when going out, when you go to work or anywhere else. They need to approve your outfit and if they don’t like it, you need to change it because they find it inappropriate.
- They always call you when you’re out, sometimes even more than once. They need to check up on you and see where are you, who you are with and what you are doing.
- They say it’s all out of love. The ultimate sign of a possessive partner is that they do it all because they love you so, so much and they can’t stand the thought of losing you.