Haven’t we all been asking ourselves what could be the thing that makes love last forever?
As the years have passed, relationships are not what they used to be, people stopped taking them as serious as they did in the past. In these situations, it is inevitable to ask if it is possible to have true love if most of the people do not take it seriously.
People today shamelessly lie and cheat and lose interest in their partners with the speed of light.
Science says that there are 3 basic traits that will lead to a lasting relationship.
The biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, in her TED talk, explains that it all has to do with activation of the dopamine in our brain.
Just like many other things in life, love releases dopamine hits that makes us feel giddy, euphoric and excited.
The more you are attracted to someone the stronger those dopamine hits become and it makes you fall in love with the same person over and over again.
Fisher’s research showed that the brain scans of the couples, who participated, showed that when they think of their partner it evoked very strong brain activity that could only mean that they are in love with their partner.
Because people change over the years and they become completely different people than the ones you married it is very hard to stay in love. They are no longer the person you fell in love in the beginning.
When the brain is recalling the person they fall in love, in the beginning, it causes the dopamine to be released, and those memories might keep you still interested in that person.
So, happy and lasting marriages have these three characteristics:
- Being able to feel empathy for your partner.
- When faced with a great deal of stress the couple remains calm and in control of the emotions.
- Being able to discard all the negative characteristics that your partner have and only focus on the positive ones.
Fisher’s research points out to have a happy relationship, it is very crucial the responsibilities fall on both of the partners.
In a situation where you think your partner has done something bad, it is important the way you will handle it.
When you fight with your partner about doing the everyday chores, don’t forget to remember all the things you have and how blessed you are.
A good relationship requires effort and work from both the partners and if one of them is slacking the relationship will fall apart.